Category: Death

I Need Less Light

My house is slowly reverting back to the cave it was before Djamila came into my life. When she was here, the curtains were always opened to allow the sun and the natural light to permeate the rooms. Even in the brutal heat of the south Texas summers, the windows were open a crack to…

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I Need a Fucking Towel

It just comes in waves, my friend. Wave after wave after wave after wave. Sometimes, the waves only hit me chest high and I remain standing when they hit, bruised and aching, but otherwise okay. Sometimes, the waves lap deliciously at my feet. It feels safe but if I pay close attention, I can see…

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One Year

It has been exactly one year since DJ died and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her. This has been one of the hardest years of my life but in the midst of all this sorrow, I want to do my best to remember Djamila as light and color and laughter.…

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I Need Inner Peace

Sometimes, I very selfishly think to myself, “you could have fought harder”. It’s a shit-ass thing to think because I know that Djamila was in a lot of pain before she died. The pain consumed her and in the midst of it all, there was really nothing I could do to help. I did my…

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I Need to Find Myself

I want to know when I’ll stop thinking in “this is what I was doing last year” increments of time? It doesn’t help a damned thing when I think that way but I just can’t seem to stop myself. This time last year, it was our last Easter together. This time last year, I rented…

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I Need Strength

Are there any Stephen King fans out there? If so, have you read Desperation? If you haven’t, let me give you a quick synopsis: There is a small town that goes by the name of Desperation, Nevada. Bad things are happening in Desperation. There are many characters to meet, but one of the main characters is…

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